Self-Care Really Ain’t An Option!

Yet we definitely treat it like it is. We are able to come up with all the reasons in the world for putting it off or not taking it that serious. I bet some of these sounds familiar:

            “Oh, I’ll get to it later”

            “I have things to get done”  

            “I don’t have time for that right now”.

            “Self-care is overwhelming. Where do I start? What does that even mean?”

            “Self-care is just a fad or excuse to not do shit and be lazy”

            “I don’t deserve to take time for me”

            “I feel bad when I do. Like I should be doing some work right now”

            “I should be working on something at all times”

            “Self-care is a luxury”

Some of these are what I like to call ‘sexy excuses’ – they sound good to us and make all the sense in the world at the time. Others are manifestations of growing up in this society, especially if you are a minority. We grind without sleep and praise workaholics. Our identities are defined by how much and what we produce. We take our work home with us and feel all the guilt and shame when we even think about taking sick days and PTO that we’ve earned! Black women are out here taking care of the world but not themselves. At what point do we say enough is enough?! The current system and ways of approaching this just isn’t working. Our fav influencers and celebrities are dealing with depression, suicide, and anxiety as a result of doing the most, overworking themselves, and not properly taking care of themselves. We see it in our own families and friends.

            We are constantly doing and producing. Most of which drains us in some form or another. Our cups are only so big, and we are constantly pouring out of them. Running on an empty cup or tank then leaves us running on fumes. We can’t get to the bag and sustain it when are operating from an empty, drained place. At what point do we refill them? That’s what self-care is all about to me – refilling my soul. Doing things that feed my soul ends up refilling my cup and I am then able to handle life a whole lot better. I’m able to create and engage with the world from a grounded place. Not from a scattered and overwhelmed place.

            If you’re reading this, then you were meant to hear this call to go hard for you! Go hard for your wellness, for your mental health! Don’t wait until you break! Your life, your passions, your goals, your dreams – it all depends on it! Whether we choose to accept it or not, self-care really aint an option.